Drop

I'm starting to feel that I dont know what exactly I want. 

I dont know what's happening to me anymore. 

Worst of all, I dont know who I am anymore.

I'm probably making th worst decision in my life for doing this, but I have to. 

This is such a selfish decision, I know.

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I'm taking a break. Taking a break from everything and just concentrate on my studies. 

I've already missed out a year, I've already wasted a year and I'm not going to lose this one. 

I keep telling myself I got to be strong and got to stop getting distracted.

But, it's not as easy as everyone think it is. 

It's more complicated than everyone thought it would be. 

Sighh, I'm probably making things difficult for myself.

Then again...

who am I trying to fool? Acting all strong and tough? Acting like I dont give a fuck about anything?

Lying has been a big part of my life now. 

The biggest lie I told was to myself, and that is ''everything is going to be fine'' .

I probably could list down all th things I lied to myself in a piece of paper and it would be half full. 

I think I lied to myself more than I do to people. 

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Yeah, I was right, life isnt going to be all perfect.